yaminagabe's reviews
381 reviews

A yound adult, composed of highschool student brimming with youthful days to spend with friends,  laughter, learning~and all I ever thought it was just another fuwa-fuwa soulful and delicate story of shounen-ai when----Alas! I strucked myself in an abyss of psychological drama consist with nothing but suffering, inner turmoil, mental attack, triggering neurotic symptoms and PTSD. Another embodiment of depression and trauma itself.

Now, I kinda felt like I was obsessing these kinds of genre nowadays which I feared I might really snap and lose myself this time. Someone should stop me!

The series was still ongoing and we just have to wait for weekly updates. But honestly, I can't get enough with this characters. They were loveable pathetic human beings living here on earth. They were the embodiment of how frail individual's are, especially the heart and the mind. It easily gets break if it's push through the limit. In terms of art style and illustration, it was so delicately drawn to life--you can feel the emotions through their detailed expression in every setting and panel. Paskim was really good at delivering her story very well to make her audiences being so affected by the atmosphere of this psychological drama.

Every MC has the same issue. Either problematic family member, bad highschool experienced, memories, trauma, bullied, the lack of attention and love--that's why they seek it from someone else---either this cliche themes keep reappearing to make the story intensified and interesting, Lost In The Clouds was an exception for me. It felt like it was truly based on real events. It was too vivid, seeking to be shared with readers. It was one of the most favourite slowburn bl without any sexual engagement to became popular in fujoshi's community! It was truly a delight read without me having an ounce of guilt reading it (just a little dosage of trauma and mental disturbance--need to be admitted to therapy and ward)

When did I started reading this? Can't remember.

A highschool teacher whose suffering from a post-depression and anxiety. At the same time, a hooker and an alcoholic, only to have this unfortunated encounter, in such pitiful state with his former pupil.

A younger 21 year old kid who was inloved with his step-sister only to be married by another man whom he had despised with passion.

Two broken hearts intertwined by one twist of fate.

Realistically, the kind of sympathy. .there were a lot of times when I really thought it was an affection. That's not a weird thing, that's just humans are. That's why I wish you wouldn't waste your time staying by my side because of the pity you feel for me.
~ Mr. Lee

The problem with this two:

Mr. Lee thought he can't commit in a relationship with Yuri since he still sees him as a child instead of a full grown adult. He keeps pressuring himself by the fact that he should act within his age and be mature for the sake of the kid's moral and well-being. He also presumed that Yuri was only sticking around his radar out of sympathy due to his detrimental situation.

Meanwhile, Yuri's obssession intensified as he spend his grace period with his former teacher and willingly to throw everything out of the window even if he approach the situation unorthodoxy for the sake of his new profound love. And the fact that he had moved on after being enticed with a middle-age guy? Seriously. . .this is truly a different form of sympathy. It wasn't even on the scale.

For one thing, Yuri was truly a toxic red flag for being too possessive-obsessive, manipulative, son of a mongrel with psychopathic tendency, who possessed a different level of anger-issues, violence and lascivious rapist--and fujoshi community keep's glorifying this vexin, throwing him with confetti of praise and compliments for 'protecting the guy.

Protecting?! I would say confining! 30 year old Teacher got freaking bewitched by this devil! He was under his hypnotic dominion! And I do sounds like Yohan expressing his indignant opinion with this twisted relationship.

However, underlying beneath this flawed character, he was just a boy who was afraid to lose someone again from the way he should've put an effort to fight for--he might still get those chances but he choose silence instead, in order to respect and not to break her peace and happiness (I am referring to his step-sis). That's why he can't afford any chances to lose or else the love that he had yearned for so long might just slips away--and he fears the thought of such dread.

Both of them just wanted someone to embrace the coldness and experienced the warm of being surrounded by unconditional love and affection.

Yet, in real life speaking; you can't find something like that nowadays or maybe, not anymore.

This mahwa keeps stalling at my library for awhile now. The first time that I've read this, honestly I was just interested with the smutty parts--but I've grown sicked with the thought of not grasping the moral concept of the story. Since it would be a total insult to the creator's effort of delivering their best to impart  and now you're just being there because you're horny. So I tend to focus to the characters and the plot, it was good. I was depressed and mentally-battered by the anxiety it gives me. Until I was driven by social isolation to reflect for a few days of what the heck did I just read. To commemorate the success of the story for making me succumbed in a disorderly state and utter confusion, let's give it a bang in the head.

*BANG! 

*Staggered in the floor *blood-flowing *spurting sound effect *died---beep--beep

I do remember I share the same peculiar fantasy about little people, scavenging and gathering teeny-tiny stuff around our home or the garden. That was when I was a little, I would practically convinced myself for having the size of thumbelina's friends.

But unlike Thumbelina, Arrietty has a family. Which is totally opposite from a lonely woman to a young 14 year old girl who was bore enough to dare talked with a human bean, to the point of defying the Borrower's tradition. .

The Borrower's were like the duwende in my hometown folklore. They were tiny people like drawves that dwells in a soil mound or a punso that's why it's known for nuno-sa-punso. But unlike the Borrowers of the western European stories, duwende in my native's origin used magic to put a cursed upon people who mistreated them or disrespected their turfs. That's why we say tabi-tabi po before entering a unknown area or a zone that we believed these mythical creatures reside to avoid 'mabuyagan' or means, being cursed.

I do remember how I considered that fern's rolled sprouts became cabbages, anthurium fruits became bread jams, iring-iring turned-into wild blackberries, agay-ay's manure makes as a fine flour. Then Snackee freebie toys became the furniture, utensils, decorations, etc. anything that we can find valuable to tiny people. That is how I grew fond with small stuff, because if your small, everything seems in proportions. You get enough food throughout the year. Even the slice of bread could be a 365 days worth of consumption and not even a morsel could be wasted--if we don't apply the concept of expiration. Useless stuff to men became a millions of worth to this people. Their different viewpoints of the world were about to exposed. I often wonder what's it really like to experience and witnessed the small wonders of the earth, even the simple small details cannot be miss out!

Arrietty Clock was a 14 year old Borrower of the family. She was bored and tedious enough being keep inside from their secret abode when finally, his father Pod decided to introduced her to their world of borrowing--by the means of it, going upstairs where human bean dwells and started to look for useful materials that a human doesn't bat an eye if it's gone.

I was first introduced by a studio ghibli movie entitled The Secret World of Arrietty (2010) where it came from the inspiration of this book itself. The setting was highly different from the film since they were using japanese characters by narrating the story. But the literature essence, themes, dramatic concept, including the idea was still noticeable and it's similarities. Meanwhile another movie in major motion pictures The Borrower's (1997) was released and gain multiple success in the market. It was a surreal feeling when I started to imagined, what if someone was also living under our floors and pipes? I begin to indulged myself with such whimsical thoughts. The way Mary Norton narrates the book truly begs to be shared and the characters were truly loveable as well.

Especially Pod and Homily, both spouse's and parent to Arrietty have nurtured their kid, grown with adventure and moral ethics by undergoing the same teaching of their traditions. It was a wild and sophisticated adventure they've had shared together and I hope I could catch another glimpse on their journey as they've been embarking another chapter of their small lives. 

And I'd never meet Uncle Heandery and Egglentina but they seems to be pretty well-decent characters. Including Spiller whom I'd expected to be dashingly-well with valour and knightly stature. 

The boy whose name seems didn't mention in the book was like a spitting image of a pitiful kid who dreams awake just like me. 

And to Mrs. Driver, this is all I could to say for a word of advice; do pick someone with your own size, will yah?

Dorothy and her dog, Toto strucked by a sudden whirlwind and find themselves teleported in the Land of Oz. She was tasked by the Wizard to kill the Wicked Witch of the East in order to sent herself back at her home in Kansas.

During her yellow-brick road exploration, she had meet new friends. Scarecrow, who wanted to have a brain. Tin Woodman who yearned for a heart. And the Cowardly Lion, whom asked to be granted with courage. All of them begin their epic adventure with laughter and tears, predicaments and difficulties thus, the inevitable troubles along the way which truly challenged the bond between this four interesting characters.

There is no place like home. .
~ Dorothy, of Kansas
: Indeed, there is no place like a home you've growned up to. Although, except to those people who weren't  relatable with the concept of this phrase. But in my part, I would still rather go back to where I've first experienced the development of my childhood and the cherishing memories I've shared with the people who've imparted my whole life.

It is such an uncomfortable feeling to know one is a fool
~ Scarecrow
Oz : You don't need brains, you are already learning something everyday. As baby has brains but it doesn't know much. Experience is the only thing that brings knowledge and the longer you are on earth, the more experience you are sure to get.

Me : You are already intelligent to be aware of your lacking. As what Socrates once said; "A true intelligent is to know he is once fool". You were aware by the distress of Tin Woodman's urgent necessities for oil and quickly took an action without being ordered. You even deduct an intricate plan to saved your unfortunate friends from the field of poppies with the help of the friendly tribe of mice. That is brainy enough to think!

I had time to think that the greatest loss I had known was the loss of my heart. While I was inlove I was the happiest man on earth, but no one can love who has not a heart
~ Tin Woodman
Oz : i think you are wrong to want a heart. It makes most people unhappy. If you only knew it, you are in luck not to have a heart
TW : that must be a matter of opinion. For my part. I will bear all the unhappiness without murmur.

Me : but you wept and felt sorrow upon the small creatures that experience torment and suffering. You have already possessed the ability to felt guilt, regret and shame. Who are also capable to sympathize with anyone you've run across to. That is plenty to be called human.

My life is simply unbearable without a bit of courage and I am terribly afraid of falling myself, but I suppose there is nothing to do but to try it.
~ Cowardly, Lion
Oz :  You have plenty of courage. All your need is confidence youself. There is no living thing that is not afraid when it faces danger. True courage is in facing danger when you are afraid and that kind of courage you have in plenty.

Me : Practicing your self-esteem is enough since it is important of every individual's well-being. And for the record you already exerted the strength and potency to kill your nemesis without remorse nor fear--which takes a lot of courage and will-power to demonstrate.

Sometimes, the things that you came looking for in life, might be just near you all the time. .