oliveslittlelibrary_'s reviews
66 reviews

Beautiful short story, the language and prose was filled with such a beautiful complexity yet still accessible. Most definitely a short story I will remember. 

Full review coming soon. stay tuned xx

Lucy is a young girl who has always felt out of place in her small, religious hometown of Crossmore. That is, until she grows close with her classmate and friend, Susannah. Their closeness, which sparked an initially confusing desire in Lucy, eventually turns into a beautiful first love for both of the girls. While Lucy builds a life and an unbreakable bond with Susannah behind closed doors, her family and friends continue to push her into starting a relationship with her best friend and neighbor, Martin, whom she has been friends with since childhood. Hence, Lucy grapples with her queer identity while falling head over heels for Susannah, which creates a challenging rift between her public life and her private life. 

I think this is a novel that I will never truly recover from. I was posting on my close friends story on Instagram, as I often do, and--partially in jest--I called this book "Normal People but if it was for lesbians." Sure, it's also set in Ireland and it's a coming-of-age story in a similar way to Normal People; however, there is a depth to this book that most other books I have read have not even come close to. I can already tell this book is going to be a piece of media that I will be insufferably obsessed with for the rest of my days. Whether it is the stunningly written prose, the beautiful portrayal of an all-consuming and innocent first love, or the incredibly relatable internal monologues we receive from our narrator Lucy, there are all too many reasons to love this book: many more than my review will be able to do justice. 

There are many reasons that I don't believe I'll recover from "Sunburn," the most prevalent among these being the sheer relatability of the story. As a queer person who also grew up in a traditional and more "closed-minded" town, where queerness was not outwardly punished but also not necessarily celebrated, this book took me right back to my youth. Reading Lucy's coming-of-age story was exactly like re-living my very own coming-of-age. I did not have the formative young queer romance that Lucy had--only very intense and queer-coded female friendships--but I know what it is like to realize you are different in a painfully homogenous town. It is a struggle that every single queer person has undoubtedly gone through at one point or another. Every single description of the beauty of being queer and the simultaneous inner guilt and self-hatred that comes with coming to terms with it, hit a nerve for me. The descriptions of feeling dirty and wrong thinking about women in a non-platonic sense. The descriptions of religious guilt. The descriptions of feeling everything fall into place when you do finally feel the love of a woman. The descriptions of the guilt of potentially disappointing your family, alienating your friends, and essentially saying goodbye to the idea of a "white picket fence" life with a man. One of my annotations of this book says "I wish I could give a copy of this to little me." I am glad I read it now, as a happily out lesbian, but I think young me might have come out to herself sooner had she had this book in her youth. At the very least, it would have made her realize things in her teenage years that instead took her until her early twenties to realize. 

This book will especially hit home for lesbians, as it specifically delves into what it means to recognize that you ONLY like women in a world where women's existences and identities tend to revolve exclusively around men. This brings me to another reason I will never forget this book: the way that compulsory heterosexuality is explored in such a real and authentic way. There are too many perfect passages about this in Sunburn to recount. All I will say is: I will be extremely surprised if I find out that the author that wrote this novel is not a lesbian, because it felt as if she was living inside of my head when she wrote about Lucy's conflicting feelings on men. It was IDENTICAL to how I felt growing up, whether it was a feeling I realized or not at the time. 

Finally, the love story. Oh, the love story. I love sapphic love so much and this book portrayed it in such a beautiful way. It centered the female gaze, which is incredible, as so many portrayals of lesbians in the media are written for the male gaze. Any queer women reading this will know how difficult it is to find authentic portrayals of women loving women in fiction. Far too often these relationships between women are over-sexualized, over-dramatized, or just not taken seriously at all (as if intimacy between women is just "girls being girls"). I have personally not read a novel with a lesbian relationship that just felt so pure and human: until Sunburn. Yes, the love was intense and all-encompassing, and did not come without its fair share of drama throughout the book, but that's just what young love is. There was no over-emphasis on the differences of the relationship because it was between two girls and not a girl and a boy (besides the emphasis on the difference in Lucy's feelings towards girls versus boys). There was also no explicit over-sexualization of the lesbians in the novel; rather, they were put on the same plane in that regard as any of the straight couples in the novel were. I'm really not sure if I worded any of that right, so I'm sorry if that makes no sense. I think at the very least, queer women will understand the significance of this. Lucy and Susannah's love was just so beautiful. They were just portrayed as two girls in love: in love in the same way as any two people might be, queer or not. The love story is so beautifully written that I ran out of Post-It tabs and ink in my pen while reading, I just had to mark so many moments. Their love, though fictional, is so important to me. I will never forget it.  

Believe it or not, this (already incredibly long) review doesn't even begin to cover the ardent love I feel for this book. I think everybody should read this, young or old. I think that queer people should especially read this. I promise it will change you just as it has changed me. 

Rating: 5 out of 5 stars ⭐️

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"Devotions" is a poetry collection by Mary Oliver published shortly before her death in 2019. 
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Mary Oliver does it again. My God. Her poetry moves me in a way I never thought was possible. Every page is full of goodness. Every time I finished one poem that particularly moved me I thought to myself "there's no way she could hit me harder than she did with this." And yet, I would turn the page and the rollercoaster of emotions would start all over again and the cycle would continue. 

Oliver's words make me FEEL. In reading this I felt happiness, I felt hope, I felt community, I felt love, I laughed, I cried, I was awestruck. I feel as if she reached into the depths of my heart and balled up every thought I have ever had about beauty, about the fleeting and cyclical nature of life, about the sacred divinity of our natural world, and spat it onto the page in neat, beautifully written stanzas. I have never felt more connected to my humanity and my existence as a part of this world than I have after finishing "Devotions." For anybody who is a writer (or anybody who likes poetry), this is an absolute MUST READ. Honestly every single person in the world should read this. No lie. It should be REQUIRED reading. I think people would treat themselves, the others around them, and the earth with more grace and compassion if they fully sat with Oliver's words. 

This is too varied a collection to write a full review on- as is expected, certain parts were incredible while others lulled a bit- but nonetheless, it is a full blown five stars from me with absolutely zero hesitation. I wish I could share my full annotations on StoryGraph & Goodreads, but I sadly cannot (it would probably take me a full day to upload). However, I will list all of my favorite poems from the collection below, in case you would like to research them yourself and get a taste for the parts of this collection I liked the most. 
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MY FAVORITE POEMS FROM "DEVOTIONS":
-I Don't Want to be Demure or Respectable 
-Don't Hesitate
-To Begin With, The Sweetgrass
-Invitation
-When I Am Among the Trees
-Oxygen
-Blue Iris
-When Death Comes
-Whelks
-October
-Wild Geese
-The Journey 
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PS: if you get yourself to read even just one of the poems above, let it be Wild Geese. It has grown to be my favorite poem of all time. 

Greta is a 45-year-old woman living in the small town of Hudson, NY. She lives a rather isolated life, with her roommate and a hive of bees as her only company. However, she works as a remote transcriber for a sex therapist in town, which is indirectly a way for her to connect to the townspeople and her world at large without stepping too far outside of the confines of her house. But Greta becomes inexplicably fascinated with one of her boss's clients, a 28-year-old European woman whom Greta nicknames Big Swiss. Things become even more real when she ends up unexpectedly meeting Big Swiss in person, and what was initially a one-sided obsession becomes a mutual, all-encompassing affair that will force both women to confront hard truths about themselves and their lives. 

This was an interesting read to say the least. Firstly, the world the author created for these characters was so incredibly niche. Greta's house in Hudson is a completely un-renovated farm house from the 18th century. It is so un-renovated to the point where it is practically decaying around her. She lives without any modern amenities and shares the house with her roommate and friend Sabine--who is also a reclusive, hard-to-pin-down middle-aged woman--and a massive hive of bees. Yes, bees. My jaw was fully dropped after the first chapter of this book because of just how strange the setting was. Hudson, NY is an entirely real place, too, that I have been to a couple of times before. It makes sense that the author herself currently lives in Hudson, as she painted what was, in my mind, a very accurate picture of what it means to live in a small and remote town where "everyone knows everyone." However, an extremely unsettling layer is added to this via the characterization of Greta's house. It quickly becomes clear that she has an entirely different experience in her private life than she does in her public life. These two realities feed into one another in increasingly disturbing ways throughout the book, especially as time passes and the lines between reality and insanity begin to blur for Greta. If there's one thing that's for sure, it's that I can respect the hell out of an author who writes a setting that genuinely makes my skin crawl.  

What was even more interesting is that Beagin uses this distressing setting--and the cast of very strange, unique characters--to parallel the distressing, strange, and unique mind that Greta directly inhabits each day. She is an excellent example of an unreliable narrator. I would not venture as far as to say the characters in this novel are likable, but you do find yourself rooting for them in a way. For me, I just wanted to see Greta get help. She is an extremely troubled character who has suffered through significant traumas and, as a result, relates to people in a very strange and disorganized manner. Reading this book was partially so unsettling because the author did such an incredible job inhabiting a character with this type of mind. Her flaws as a character are ones that you, too feel you are living inside of just by nature of reading this book. The author also goes as far as using different settings and characters to symbolize Greta's mental state, trauma, and the way in which she interacts with others. It is thus a profound reflection on how the maintenance of one's mental health--or lack thereof--can seep into every aspect of their life until their surroundings become a direct reflection of their mind. 

Aside from not finding the characters to be particularly likable, one of the weaker points of the novel was the believability of the relationship between Big Swiss and Greta. I think this is partially due to the fact that neither of them are stable enough to have a real connection with one another, but even so I found it hard to relate to either character's perspective in the story. The circumstances in which it developed were questionable to say the least, but they nevertheless taught one another important lessons about human connection. Because of this, I would have liked to be rooting for their relationship to work out a bit more, but I think I never got too attached because I knew it was doomed from the start. 

Overall, I would recommend this novel for its use of symbolism to represent trauma in an extremely clever way. As previously stated, the author also did an incredible job developing the setting. If you like a read that  thoroughly unsettles you but also contains humorous moments and glimpses of emotional depth, this is for you. If you're looking for a WLW romance, I would recommend looking elsewhere, as queer love and identity is definitely not the centerpiece of the novel. However, if you are interested in looking at the role that complex  trauma plays in human connections, you will be happy with this read. 

Rating: 3.75 out of 5 stars ⭐️

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Isa is a twenty-one year old girl who has just moved from the UK to New York City alongside her best friend Gala, with virtually no plan. "Happy Hour" is the resulting novel. The epitome of a "summer read," it is a pleasant yet emotionally in tune stream-of-consciousness journey through one girl's three summer months in New York City.

My first praise for this novel is for its narrator. Isa is young and very much acts like it, but the author gives her an incredible emotional depth that is perfectly balanced with her decision-making that is, well, what you would expect from a girl in her twenties on her own in New York City. Sometimes I would be in the middle of a seemingly lighthearted passage-- Isa out on a date, taking an odd job, galavanting around the city late at night-- and suddenly be struck with a quote or observation that hit me where it hurt (as someone who is currently lost in my twenties myself). Isa's experiences are ones we can relate to, especially if you are a younger reader like me. The structure of the novel is made to feel like how it feels to grow up: like you're on FaceTime with your best friend, learning to navigate the ups and downs together yet simultaneously charting your own course.

Another praise I have for the novel is how well fleshed-out the world it takes place in is. Despite no specific mention of a time period--one could assume from context clues, though, that it is within 5-10 years of the present day--New York City is portrayed very well. It's glamorized, sure, but that's kind of the point. We're seeing it exactly how a newcomer is: through rose-colored glasses. I was fully immersed in this world when reading and despite being quite familiar with New York City, it made it all seem brand new. 

I think something I might have liked to see even more of were Isa's moments in solitude. Though her best friend Gala does "complete" the world, per se, part of me might have been even more attracted to this novel had it just been about Isa completely charting her own course. That's very much a personal preference, though, and the novel still has moments of Isa's self-discovery scattered throughout. I am also partial to darker and occasionally more sad literature, and as I mentioned previously, this book felt very light and refreshing overall. 

I wouldn't recommend this to people who need constant plot motion to keep them going, as it is virtually nonexistent in this novel, but you'll love this book if you want to read coming-of-age stories but don't want depressing ones. This is also a GREAT read if you are experiencing life alone in a city for the first time, or if you are about to.

ps: If you are still in the throes of "Brat summer" you should definitely read this: I think BRAT is the perfect companion album for this novel in my opinion (:

Ok ok i needed a day to collect my detailed thoughts...

Holy sh*t this book is incredible. I have quite possibly never read a work by an author where the prose and pacing of the story was so well controlled. IMHO the only book that rivals how well-controlled this one was is A Little Life (and i may be biased bc that's one of my favorite books of all time, but still). I think the pacing of this book (and the impressive amount of control Donna Tartt has over her craft) was the most admirable thing about it from an artistic standpoint. 

You kind of "love to hate" the characters in this book. Our narrator Richard comes from a much more humble background than his peers in the Classics department, so initially he is someone you are kind of rooting for--it's complicated--but as you watch him get so absorbed in the ways of his Hampden peers you question yourself all over again and wonder if you should really be on his side, or anyone's at all for that matter. Though bad things happen in the book, with a specific focus on two distinct acts of immorality by Richard and his peers, a specific "villain" is never really revealed or made obvious. I LOVED that about the book- it suggests that immoral acts are just acts and can be committed by anyone, even people one might not see as "immoral" people. 

My critiques and what I would have liked to see more of:
Despite how well-paced and well-controlled the book was, the plot did lull at times. I think this partially just comes from it being such a long story and a deep study of character and scene. I was never tempted to DNF it, not at ALL, but I would say around the 2/3 mark, it lost a little steam. That's really it from me, though, stylistically. 
Something i WISH this book did more of was characterize Julian, the Hampden Classics professor, a bit more. This is something I think the author deliberately chose to do--she wanted his background to remain a mystery--but I found myself wanting to understand him a bit more so I could better contextualize the impact he had on the students. I think a character study of Julian could be quite interesting had we had more info on him. 

I think anyone who loves academia and morally ambiguous characters would especially love this book, even people fascinated with crime and the motives of criminals may love it too. However I think any reader could find something to love about The Secret History. I can see this book being studied in AP Lit classes in the near future (if it's not already) and being etched into the literary bible as a "modern classic."

PERFECT. NO NOTES

May finish in the future! Trying to get out of a reading slump at the moment and this book was not doing it