clovetra's reviews
221 reviews

Mary: An Awakening of Terror by Nat Cassidy

dark reflective tense medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.0

oh wow. oh wow oh wow oh wow this was glorious. that’s truly the only way i can describe this. shout out angry women.

now let’s get out of the way why this is a 4-star — a lot of points in this book weren’t allowed to breathe imo. a lot of things were not fully fleshed out or explained, and although at times having the reader and the mc figuring things out together can work, for this book it didn’t feel like it worked. idk i felt like the horror elements needed to start a looottttt earlier, and let the audience be a step ahead of mary. alas, that did not happen. this can also apply to the “secret” of the town, as well as mary’s “true” identity. i’ll be real i didn’t see the twist about the town coming, but although i guessed mary’s twist, it wasn’t because i had all the ‘information’ before she did — my ass just went with what i thought the author would go for. i just guessed. no evidence i just threw something to the wall and it stuck.

furthermore (my lab reports are getting to me), the horror wasn’t properly… explored? at least for a good chunk of this book. i mean this is something that can’t realistically be worked around considering mary is the queen of blacking out, but then it just left me to fill in the blanks. realistically yes that can work cuz “ooo what the mind can drum up is always terrifying!” except not for my autistic ass. instead i’ll just sit there trying to work out what actually did happen, and be confused until it’s spelled out for me. so all the horror where the reader was left in the dark? sorry it’s a pet peeve when stories do that like SHOW ME THE HORROR MANNNN IF I WANT TO IMAGINE IT I’D JUST MALADAPTIVELY DAYDREAM!!!!!

also some twists just felt. stupid. like not in terms of it being added to the story — nat cassidy really brought everything to life in a magnificent way — but some elements were giving more magical realism. which i mean if my horror teeters to contemporary i want it to stay that way. if ur gonna do magical realism horror…. commit u know. idk it’s hard to describe *why* i didn’t like the plot’s direction, because it was written well… just some elements felt silly. especially the epilogue w/ mary 😭😭 like this book was well written some parts just felt too batshit for me to suspend my disbelief. like for note, chipotle. like i’m sorry that had me cackling. idk if the humour is intentional or not but this book was too goofy at times.

ok so what did i actually like? Mary. is. a. Bad. BITCH!

also i gotta note her collecting porcelain figurines is so me. girl i love royal doulton bunnies i get u homegirl. she’s somehow so relatable and Not. like she’s what i’d wish i was at 50 and yet is such a loser 😭 it’s such a fun dichotomy which makes her so interesting. honestly if mary was boring i would’ve been much meaner towards this book. nat cassidy honestly tore up mary’s characterisation. as well as everyone elses. like my god NADINE??? her last handful of scenes…. my GODDD she’s a hoot. added some needed light scenes to the book. eleanor was interesting too…. until the end (i don’t like the direction she went in but that’s just personal preference). the town mostly felt like it was full of tropey ‘villains’, but nadine really came thru for the supporting cast.

the ending was really sweet too. it really resonated with me as only recently have i come to terms with Aging. which feels silly to say when im only 19 but still. getting older is scary. and i’ve always had a fear of wasting my life. Seize the Moment! but idk this book just made me feel more content with my realisation that…. hey life is long. i can take breaks. also ur disabled so calm ur fucking farm clover oh my god. but yeah it was really sweet to see mary come to terms with her age! and her body! god do i get that one. all the power to you mary.

the best part of this book was easily the second half, although i will admit the first half was….. Slow. yes ik we have to build up to things but sometimes i wished it moved a tad faster. oh well.

i will say tho one horror element that got me were the fucking ants. you can show me gore for days but BUGGSSSS?????????????????? shiver me timbers!!!

Content Warnings

1984 by George Orwell

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challenging dark tense slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.0

what an incredibly fascinating book.

as much as i want to say i loved this book for what it is and not what it stands for…. i can’t.

sure i was rooting for winston, but in some odd way i also wasn’t. i defo wasn’t rooting for julia - i actually couldn’t stand her but whatever. and i defo wasn’t rooting for the party, as ngl life there sounds like hell on earth. so i don’t know how, when reading this, i was simultaneously worried and not worried for winston. i simultaneously was waiting for him to get shot and simultaneously hoping he didn’t.

i honestly was quite bored at some spots. like sorry the book was 30 PAGES. i wanted to pull my hair out. but almost like stockholm syndrome i look back at those 30 pages and go “huh what was written there was smart”. insert meta-commentary about me being weak to big brother blah blah blah. i already know i would be a sheep following along no question in my mind man.

there really felt like there was no plot here, and for the life of me i cannot explain why i kept coming back to this book. but i did.

idk i found the foundations of the party to concerningly mirror real life, and the politics fascinated me. communism is such a complex topic and i really enjoyed the explorations into it, even if the commentary was a tad surface level.

for someone who’s been dead since the 50s man had extremely strong clarity in terms of communism.

i don’t really know what else to say. this book is almost beyond explanation for me. i’ve been sitting here for 20 minutes debating what rating i even give this, because i half hated and half loved this. i literally can’t tell if i even enjoyed this. my brain is mush. insert another meta-commentary here about me being so fallible to the party’s tactics blah blah blah clover sheep. goodnight.

Content Warnings

Everyone on This Train Is a Suspect by Benjamin Stevenson

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adventurous challenging dark mysterious medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.0

i’ve officially read 100 books in 2024 🤯🤯🤯 i am insane.

anyways erm… i didn’t really like this as much as the original!

for one, the threads were a lot harder for me to follow. my ass kept confusing the psychologist with the crime writer with the forensic dude. too many strings that were just surface level.

the connection to an old mystery in this book felt weak, and it was only there for a meta-commentary of “hey look this is what all crime novels do! aren’t i witty breaking the fourth wall and pointing this out?” to include an old case and weave it into the current crime is one thing, but for it to have almost no effect on the story felt like a massive waste of my time.

every side character felt boring. did not give a flying fart about anyone other than the psychologist and lisa. and that’s only cuz i Love Women (/j im kidding its because they seemed innocent to me). there were so many red herrings to the point that it wasn’t fun anymore. i was just waiting for the reveal.

the explanation of the crime was fair. like i see the connections now it’s pointed out but holy fuck how many working pieces this had…. like props to stevenson for being able to pull off a book with this much shit going on, but it just made me feel fatigued reading it.

the ending felt rushed, the plot felt as though it was meandering a lot more than the previous instalment, and it felt like a lot of the time people were just pissfarting around.

ernest was actually insufferable in this book. yes i get his character. i liked it in the first book. here he comes off as pretentious, egotistical, and just downright unlikeable. yes yes insert meta commentary about how this shows just because he’s the narrator doesn’t mean he’s automatically the good guy blah blah blah. i will say this until the cows come home — if you’re metacommentary makes the book boring to read, i don’t give a shit if thematically you wrote the bible, i will not like it.

i really think this is a case where a sequel tries to recreate the joys of the first novel, and instead sets itself up with unrealistic expectations and falls flat. honestly whilst starting this i had plans to read the next instalment, which has just come out. now? i’m gonna be honest and say im almost turned off by this entire series. i might read it closer to december as its a christmas book and so i can say ive finished the ernest cunningham series… but this book was a stinker for me.

Content Warnings

The Dragon Republic by R.F. Kuang

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adventurous challenging dark tense fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

wow. i gobbled this up.
i somehow came to love rin even more.
another war plot felt realistic and not cheap.
all the characters were fleshed out in amazing depth. special shout out to venka and qara thank god they got some more time in the spotlight.
the plot twists were gut wrenching, and the explanations of death made me want to eat the book out of sadness.
this was a perfect progression of rin's story, and i cant wait to see how she progresses.
ok now spoilers:

nezha can go get fucked. i get now why people ship him with rin and also why people cant fucking stand him.
i was almost about to cry over qara. and then they FUCKING KILL BAJI AND SUNI. AND THEN RIGHT AFTER FUCKING RAMSA. evil evil EVIL!!!
also i was GAGGED by jinzha's death. actually had to close the book and ponder about cooking someone into dumplings. insane.
kitay and rin being anchored is so real and cute. thank god kitay got his well deserved time in the limelight.
wish the book had more of the cike featured, and went a bit further into daji as a character cuz she seemed super interesting! but i mean theres another 600 page book so hopefully i get some of that next book

Content Warnings

Cursed Bunny by Bora Chung

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dark mysterious medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.0

a short story collection i actually like !!!!!
sorry usually im such a hater regarding short story collections because they’re often so totally diverse i feel like im getting whiplash, but this did not happen!!! i had a fun time!!!!
im honestly amazed the tone and themes were consistent especially with the array of stories. i mean the head is horrifying as all hell (i literally had a nightmare about it after i read it my god); ruler of the winds and sands was speculative fiction; reunion made me want to sob; and goodbye my love gave me the sapphic robot story i didn’t know i needed.
standout stories for me are;
- the head: obv — if i dream about a book it means i’ve been pondering that shit deeply. i drove an hour after reading this and i just kept replaying it in my mind.
- cursed bunny: was very much a slow burn, but my god when this got going it went in HARD
- scars: this reminded me so much of genie the feral child and idk i was rooting for the youth so hard and that ending. god.
- reunion: any book mentioning eastern europe is immediately winning brownie points for me. extra bonus points as literally two days ago my grandpa’s ancestrydna updated to say he’s polish (bro has had no idea). seems random for me to mention that but idk it felt like a funny coincidence that made me like this story more. i mean it was also good as well im just easily swayed by mentions of eastern europe
ngl some stories in this collection were…. Fine. like compared to the other stories in this collection, frozen finger & embodiment sucked sorry not sorry.
anyways one story mentioned mulled wine so i’m gonna go make some forralt bor and get white girl wasted at 2am bless up

Content Warnings

The Crucible by Arthur Miller

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challenging emotional tense fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

oh the crucible, the crucible. the first book i was ever assigned for in school that i actually enjoyed reading.

i think this book is such a love of mine simply because it has such a strong nostalgia factor. sitting in my year 9 classroom, before i became chronically ill and a pandemic happened, sitting with my friends, listening to an audio recording of this play. reacting to every scene, expressing my hatred of abigail and mary to my friends, rooting for rebecca nurse, truly experiencing the atmosphere. i really think my first read of this was the best reading experience ive ever had.

this book isn’t exactly the next coming of christ. its parallels to mccarthyism sure are interesting, and i always love me some salem witch trials, but this book is what it is - a short play. but i can’t say this book doesn’t enamour me.

even knowing what happens, i was sitting here with my blood boiling, racing to hope proctor would be free and danforth would listen to the pleas of those around him.

i honestly think as more time passes this book ages like fine wine, and is very emblematic of current times. hell it can even be applied to modern day america. you don’t even have to change anything, as when miller wrote this everyone was losing their minds about communists! and republicans still are! maybe add some silly comment about 5G or the vaccines or hathorne rolling up to salem in his cybertruck.

from a psychology standpoint this book is incredibly fascinating. and from someone who loves reading about the salem witch trials this book is incredibly fascinating. i love witches. fuck abigail and mary. shout out giles corey for being a stubborn prick.

Content Warnings

Before the Coffee Gets Cold by Toshikazu Kawaguchi

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adventurous emotional lighthearted reflective sad fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.0

oh. i didn’t expect to be this sad. i am broken yet somehow not. this book is very confusing for my emotions. like on one hand i want to bawl my fucking eyes out, but on the other hand it’s somehow uplifting????

i’ll say this book really starts off slow. after reading the first chapter i really thought this was gonna be a 3-star for me. but my god that fucking second chapter. THAT SECOND CHAPTER.

my grandpa is going thru dementia right now so i’m not kidding i was sobbing like a little baby.

the third chapter was pretty sad as well, but then that final chapter hit me like a tonne of bricks. how is this book pulling on my major heart strings.

first an old man with dementia and then a kid without her parent?????????????

i think this book was engineered to psychologically break me /j

the characters felt pretty flat and one-dimensional apart from kei, and after the first chapter the plot felt kind of predictable. but i mean i think i just loved this book because it knew how to tug on my heartstrings.

i’m very conflicted with this because on the one hand yes i did cry and usually a book that makes me cry is an automatic 4-star (at least), but man the actual book itself was quite mediocre. i think if this book didn’t hit my tear triggers i would be very Meh on this.

i will say tho i really liked how when someone travels, if the people in the cafe are aware of the time travelling chair, they realise that person is from the future. idk i thought that was a neat addition you don’t see too often in books where people time-travel. like instant “oh hi ur from the future!” no ifs ands or buts.

anyways shout out to hirai she seems cool

Content Warnings

Everyone In My Family Has Killed Someone by Benjamin Stevenson

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challenging mysterious tense medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

damn. this is probably the best adult mystery novel i’ve read.

i mean already bonus points for being australian. like idk the tone of this book just makes sense to be australian. it’s so goofy and wacky yet insane. once i realised the setting i went “ahhh yes everything already makes sense”.

also props to the writing of ernest. not only is he so incredibly funny, but he’s intelligent and intriguing. he has a personality beyond the detective role in this novel, and his fourth wall breaks were just epic. i mean cmon him telling us after someone’s vomiting “she’s not pregnant u idiots i know it’s a cliche but she’s not pregnant i can assure you”. and this book is just that for like 370 pages which was AMAZING. i always love me some well-timed meta-commentaries and this book is filled to the brim with it. i’m so serious at times i was doubting this was a work of fiction and not just an autobiography with some names changed.

the other characters in this cast felt a little flat to me, but i think that’s just because there’s so many people. almost everyone except ernest is reduced to one or two facts about them until the very end where there is exposition diarrhoea about every single character.

except andy bro was just along for the ride. he started the story with a beer, and ended it with hitting someone with a fire poker. thank you for your service andy

and that brings me to why this book isn’t 5-stars — the actual mystery. now i will always give a book credit where credit is due, in that i didn’t guess the killer. yay!!!! but honestly i don’t think i could if i tried. so much was going on even at my hardest i could not follow what was going on. and when this character is hiding x and this character is hiding y and this character is hiding z i was just flatlining. there’s a fine line between keeping your audience on their toes and letting your mc figure out the mystery just before they do, and having ur reader so fucking lost that they have no hope of figuring it out until the great reveal where all is explained. like yes okkkkk i do understand how this all went down at the end…. but holy shit there were so many fucking moving pieces and conclusions leapt to by one liners i really had no hope. and that is where this book lets me down. it’s trying to be so clever and it does achieve that, but at the risk of the reader having to just roll with the punches because almost every chapter there is a plot twist and at some point you just cannot keep up with them anymore.

i will say though that i will defo be continuing this series, as although i just bitched and moaned about how this book was too intelligent, i still had a great time.

i will say though that as much as this book tries to sell to the readers that it is not your average mystery novel…… by the end it lowkey does turn out to be 🤐

Content Warnings

Lady Macbeth by Ava Reid

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emotional mysterious tense fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

3.0

now my expectations were already astronomically high because i adore macbeth. it’s probably my favourite shakespeare work because i studied it so intensely in high school to the point my teacher literally made me read lady macbeth. i was on crack when we read macbeth, having the time of my life.

i think i went in with my expectations so insanely high this book was never going to be able to live up to what i was expecting. i do think this book did have some wins.

for one, hello roscille!!!! she’s such an interesting character. i loved how cunning she was, even for something as small as wishing for the coat to the end. i will say her motivations didn’t feel authentic to me reading this, so at times where i should’ve been rooting for her, i was instead trying to work out why she was doing something.

i don’t really like what was done to macbeth in this either. idk i liked how in the original they were very clearly madly in love until the story begins, whereas this story paints him to be like every other man. yes yes i know this is a “feminist” retelling so therefore macbeth kind of needs to be a bit more brutish, but i wasn’t a fan. lady macbeth going along with macbeth’s plot in the original felt realistic, as they were a power couple and went beyond the classic representation of shakesperian relationships. roscille and macbeth here just felt like a cliche, and it was honestly a bit boring and predictable at times.

the overall plot was decent… until fantasy elements enter which are so immersion breaking it actually annoyed me a bit. the witches’ were adapted well to this story and i like the depth that was added to them, but their ending felt stupid and rushed. and don’t get me started on lisander. this book did not need that addition to his character and completely changed the tone of the story.

the ending was also incredibly lacklustre. we have built up to this big battle for so long and it just….. fizzles out. like seriously when we spend most of the book with roscille pissfarting around and then the ending happens in the span of like 5 pages. what are we doing here.

as with any retelling, there were changes to this adaptation. some of them were great! i loved the element of roscille and her veil, although i don’t really think it added much to the plot, but hey it seemed cool. some deaths were changed, and some new characters were added, like senga. senga has my heart baby grill u can ride with me. but the changes to the story felt a bit surface level for me, and honestly ‘if it ain’t broke don’t fix it’. i will say however that my little autistic brain did a little dance whenever trepanation was mentioned. my ass loves old timey medicine!!!!!!!!

finally, ava reid the woman you are. god her prose was so addicting. the style she writes in is so unique yet so fascinating. i loved it.

i really think feminist retellings are overdone. the market is incredibly oversaturated, and at times it feels cliched and boring. the new plot elements added to this book certainly help set it apart from the rest, but i really don’t think this lives up to its original inspiration.

Content Warnings

The Poet X by Elizabeth Acevedo

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emotional inspiring reflective fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0

i mean this was cute!!!! i’ve heard rave reviews about this and honestly was expecting a bit more.
i think this book fell a bit flat for me because i don’t have a hint of religious trauma. i can count on my hands the amount of times ive been to a church service. i imagine what xiomara goes through in this book is the reality for a lot of children, but for me it almost felt a bit cartoonish.
xiomara herself was kind of interesting, but it was hard to imagine xiomara as three-dimensional due to the length of this book. idk this entire story i couldn’t fully get immersed — i was always reminded i was reading a fictional book.
i really liked the climax, it felt realistic and raw, but idk after that the book took a nose dive.
i think the main thing for me is that because this is a poetry collection, there’s only so much that can be conveyed in the span of a book.
this is my second acevedo book and i think my last. sadly i don’t think her writing style is for me :(

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clovetra's reviews 221 reviews

clovetra's reviews
221 reviews