This delightfully cosy sci-fi features a clueless but big-hearted AI; a snarky, sweary, sociopathic toddler; and a man who just wanted to watch some p0rn.
I saw another reviewer describe this as a modern take on Jane Eyre. On One hand, that’s completely unfair to Mr Rochester. But on the other, that’s exactly the vibe of the first two-thirds or so of this book.
I also found it very reminiscent of The Secrets of Mill House Anne Wyn Clark. Different enough to be its own story but similar enough to make me suggest not reading them too close together or the plots will merge.
TL;DR – If you want a feminism that includes only cis-het women who adhere to classic ideas of femininity, then this book is for you.
The longer version…
Let's talk about this.
So set the context, let's say I have a complicated relationship with feminism. To me, it has always felt like an exclusive club – one where I'm not welcome, where I wouldn't fit in, and where I'd really rather not be a member.
Now, plenty of feminists are inclusive. Plenty are open about the fact that the misogyny problem this planet has can't (and shouldn't) be left only to women to fix. Misogyny doesn't impact only women.
Coming to terms with the fact I'm not – and don't have to be – a woman has left me somewhat more open to feminism. Well, to some flavours of feminism.
Over the last month, I've made a concerted effort to listen to Black voices – and, in particular, to Black women. I've read a few books from Black feminists recently. And writers like Brittney Cooper and Emma Dabiri have opened my mind to the idea that feminism can and should be for everyone.
So here we are.
Obviously, the title of this book grabbed me. Maybe, I thought… Maybe this book can persuade me once and for all that I can be at least an associate member of the Feminist Club.
Alas, several minutes in I started getting some serious TERFy vibes. I paused the book and went to do some research on the author.
Sigh.
The author is a TERF and a strong supporter of JKR.
Throughout the book, the author repeatedly mentions that men and women are different. First she talks about biology and hormones and whatever. Which is a TERFy dogwhistle.
Sure, yes, she also makes some excellent points. But, for me, these were outweighed muddied by the us vs them conclusions she draws.
'Masculinity is a hard small cage and we put boys inside this cage.' Yep, 100%. Right there with you.
'But by far, the worst thing we do with males, by making them feel they have to be hard, is that we leave them with very fragile egos.' I don't know if that's the *worst* thing, but it's definitely up there.
'And then we do a much greater disservice to girls because we raise them to cater to the fragile egos of males.' No, sorry. If, as the title says, we should all be feminists, then surely we must acknowledge that this mindset harms us all. I can't agree with this statement.
Men, on average, come out on top in the misogynist global hierarchy. Or, at least some of them do. Women and gender-minority people have, on the whole, less power in our society.
But on an individual level, misogyny strips potential and possibility away from all of us. It endeavours to fit each of us into a mould that fits no one. It robs us all.
Alas and alack, I'm still on the outside looking in at your special club, wishing I'd stayed home instead.
Anyways, if you want a feminism that includes only cis-het women who adhere to classic ideas of femininity, then this book is for you.
Although I have very different intersectionality than the author, I still found a lot of what she said resonated with my experience. Definitely a worthwhile read.
A book about racism written by a White person… I was sceptical.
So ideas about it before deciding whether to read it. And the thing I read in the reviews that persuaded ultimately ended up being the key message of the book: the work of deconstructing racism building a better world CAN’T BE DONE SOLELY BY BLACK PEOPLE. Nor should it be. White people caused racism; it’s our mess to clean up.
Because we were socialised into racist culture. We need to do the work to unlearn that.
Now, one thing that I intensely disliked about this book was the author’s use of racial slurs. Don’t get me wrong; she’s not wielding slurs against people. She’s quoting other people and referencing how White people sometimes use words as weapons. And I need to think about whether her use of those words angers me because they’re not her words to use or because, in using them, she’s calling attention to the problem they represent. I’d like to think it’s the former. But I need to think about that.
Because I’ve still got a lot of racism to unlearn.