I'm at Crossroads: I love this book, but then...

This book was a constant for me, it occupied my thoughts even when I wasn't reading it. I loved the beginning, it was captivating- so very imaginative and a reflection of distorted beliefs. A child's- Christopher's- faith is tested ever since he was a child. That's until his thoughts imposed too much on him and become critical of his actions and his lifestyle, forcing him to leave familiarity and pursue a life elsewhere. When raised up by strict parents who aren't very flexible, encouraging or even accepting in their views, this is quite easily a forgone conclusion. During his time away from his small-town Christian community, he faces conflicting views- some of which are quite unorthodox. He can't help but judge his new Church community and eventually leaves to pursue another journey- of a more spiritual nature- to seek God, this is essentially provoked by his battles with a guilty addiction and doubts of God's existence.

I found this the most intriguing: how his thoughts became so liberated, a breath of fresh air, a cool serenity. His quick companionship with a 44 year old man was witty and it, too, was refreshing: it almost cemented the possibility of him finding God, that maybe he really could venture out there and live freely. This is disrupted and then, fragmented when they find themselves trusting the wrong man: of all people, perhaps the least expected.

Michael Sauret writes with a brilliant yet bewitchingly subtle vision: he explores the greater picture. He writes of more than just young Christopher's childhood, then his adolescence and finally, his adulthood. No, he writes of an individual's journey of attaining faith, of coming to realise what faith really is, and what exactly it is. Sauret surprisingly does this by exposing how corrupt a religious constitution can become- some churches may thrive themselves on power and influence; others on popularity and wealth. He writes of this in a purely fabricated manner, but the true message remains: we shouldn't be afraid to question, we shouldn't be quick to trust nor judge and we shouldn't allow anyone- anyone who can easily become corrupt- to be sovereigns over us.

I do not disagree with religion at all, so do not be mistaken in believing that I only liked this book, because I am a critic of religion. Though, I have to admit that maybe it was too heavy on Christian principles, especially with all the lengthy sernons, maybe I couldn't fully appreciate it because I am not a Christian (though I do follow an Abrahamic faith). I just felt it was a bit much, almost like the author was forcing the Bible on us- as though, this was imaginative way of making us read it. I don't know...

There were other slight inconsistencies and loose ends: Christopher and his childhood friends seemed pretty close but when he returns home, there is no mention of them- no reunion. Also the birthday jump, how did the neighbours not see the children jumping? How did teachers not learn of what was going on? Then, you get Christopher's father- in dealing with his grief- he consumes a lot of alcohol. Did Pastor Rock no longer play a role in his life? I don't suppose he visited the church whilst in his intoxicated state. And then with Pastor Nobel and The Household, did no one file missing persons reports? These were just a few questions that were niggling at the back of my mind, especially whenever I was shocked about a certain chapter. Like I wrote, this book is a constant- I kept thinking about it.

I received a copy of this book through NetGalley.