@ author dear lord i hope ur not reading this - i am SO HAPPY FOR YOU that you are published

yall are LIARS in here giving it stars. is it because i listened to the audiobook? would reading it with my eyeballs make this better? probably not because 5 minutes into the audiobook i already wanted to quit.

liiiiisten i love me some enemies to lovers but what in the world do you mean that the only reason they're enemies is because... he was horny for her and because she's too bubbly and outspoken... also the fact that he was thinking of undressing a barely-21 year old girl when he was ... 29??? 28???? i know in america the age of consent is 18 but holy fuck bro. don't get me wrong, i can get down with an age gap, but not when one of them doesn't even have a fully loaded frontal lobe.

and don't get me started on the huge ass exposition dump at the beginning. jk get me started! because how did we go from them being hot and bothered in a closet to her trauma dumping to me about a JACKET and her longstanding friendship with emmy??????? it's OKAY to withhold information from readers and it's especially okay to do a nice lil show not tell moment to tell me how close they are.

dear lord gus and teddy's banter isn't even fun man TT^TT. her version of banter is just so childish (re: her leaving the closet and doing the "hehe u got smth on ur shirt. sike!" prank on him so that she has the "final word"). AGAIN THEIR ENEMIES TO HORNY ARC WAS JUST SO QUICK LIKE WHY ARE WE SAYING THIS IS AN ENEMIES TO LOVERS BOOK WHEN IT IS NOT. where the hell is the angst and yearning. i feel bamboozled

what i liked: the relationship between teddy and the kid was very very sweet. but like oh god the age gap btwn teddy and gus really made it feel like she was a teenage babysitter rather than a future mommy figure. idk man

also i genuinely could not take the spicy scenes seriously.