ALRIGHT HERE WE GO Y'ALL THIS IS GOING TO BE AN ANGRY AND SEMI-COHERENT REVIEW RIDDLED WITH GIFS AND SPOILERS (which will be marked you can read this even if you're planning on reading this book--but honestly do you not value my opinion at all?!)

ugh!!! i had such high hopes for this book!

but, no. just like the love between two archetype'd robyn schneider characters, my beliefs were scorned. it was just the beginning of everything: maybe we'll die how sad is that let's be pretentious we're so young so full of life so much wasted potential edition. some amazing unique special snowflake she-doesn't-know-she's-beautiful perfect specimen of a girl falls in luuuuuuv with a hot guy. a completely vanilla, absolutely no interesting qualities type.

Spoiler

and the love is scorned in both books can you believe it oh my god it's the twist no one saw coming

Spoiler

except like, no. i predicted from the get-go that mary sue sadie would dieeee. and it would be so saaaad and change mr. vanilla's life forever. boo hoo.

what a coinky-dink that in this group of five friends, the survival rate of the disease is four out of five. SOMEONE'S GOTTA DIE. well, two people in this case. but whatever.

i don't even know how to organize this review. so many things pissed me off. I NEVER EVEN WRITE FULL REVIEWS. I SCRAWL THINGS.

but when i don't like a book, i usually have that feeling going in! and despite my strong dislike of the beginning of everything, i still thought i was going to like this book!

this is mainly due to the following reasons:
1) i only heard good things
2) the premise is pretty cool
3) alright, fine, the cover rocks.



so with my expectations in mind, let's set up the plotline. this is going to be like mildly detailed so if you still want to read the book you should probably skip this part. I'M SORRY I KNOW I SAID THIS WOULD BE SAFE TO REAd

poor widdle lane has TB. except it's now inexplicably different. it's completely resistant to drugs, and yet the mortality rate at a sanatorium where everyone has it is a mere 20%. also it's EXTREMELY CONTAGIOUS!!! but omg why are my parents worried lol i'm fine also they only have a 10% chance of contracting it if they're in contact with me but they'll be fired if they "test positive for exposure" (wtf??)

so the science here doesn't really check out.



anyway, lane arrives at this top-notch expensive sanatorium, granted opportunities anyone else with TB would literally kill for (and that's just in the US). and he hates it there.



maybe i'm not being fair. but this is an epidemic, possibly a pandemic, and his only symptoms are being tired once in a while and coughing sometimes, and this kid is chilling having amazing once-in-a-lifetime experiences with his perfectly quirky popular clique, who are just too cool to deal with these people trying to help them, and they could only ever possibly flourish in this obscure scenario. honestly i cannot picture these kids at a public high school.



SPEAKING OF WHICH, why are there only teenagers in this place?!



anyway he falls in with this group and then falls in love with unique beauty over there, blah blah blah. occasional insertion of coughing fit as a reminder that This Typical And Boring Love Story Is Beautiful Because They Might Die. how deep.



then more stuff happens and shit hits the fan but it's all right but then it's A MILLION TIMES WORSE.



except that at the page that probably inspired tears in some of people who cry during john green books, i cracked an incredulous grin.



don't waste your time on this book.