I don't know what to feel!

I can't help but feel that this book destroyed the whole series: to find that the whole faction system was an experiment killed me. It was like saying it was that they were real people in a film set or in a fake videogame. It was what every school teacher discourages: I remember my English teachers would always remind us not to make the story a dream that the characters wake up from. "It dulls the tension", they would say.

And then to find that there's yet, another corrupt government in control and then, to discover more secrets...it was too much. I just wanted it all to end. But when it did, I wanted more. It was so good, but I couldn't stand the ending.

It was the factions which first drew me in to the series, the action was good too, but by this third book everything lost its spark. There were just more battles, constant betrayals and  these passionate uprisings. I enjoy thinking about revolutions, and the leaders but it kept niggling at me that these individuals were mostly teenagers. And, as much as I was aware that they weren't innocent nor naive, it just didn't add up. Their missions were no longer fun. And it seemed as though Tris had a death wish, but no one questioned her. They were blind followers and she didn't feel any pressure?

But then, when I got more into the story I found that Tris and Tobias' relationship was becoming quite rocky. This was new and I was glad for it. The romance was becoming boring. But their dispute arose because of one mistake on Tobias' part, albeit a huge mistake (over a hundred lives were lost) but Tobias was just an unknowing accomplice. I would expect Tris to understand, she had made mistakes: surrendering herself to the Erudite, trusting Caleb, pushing Al over the edge (not literally).... And eventually, I lost my patience with her, it got to the point where I felt she needed to be taken down a notch- she was basking in self-glory and turning against a man who had been with her through  near-death experiences. They had a Romeo and Juliet romance, except it wasn't forbidden and hadn't yet become a tragedy but they each had been willing to sacrifice themselves for the other: right up until Tobias' mistake.

And then when she forgave or rather began to understand Tobias, I warmed up to her again. But then, I noticed how she horribly alienated those who had betrayed her, namely her brother (Caleb), so at times she was an Abnegation but other times not? I had thought she understood what it felt like to not belong, at least it seemed that way from the first book, but now, I'm not so sure. For someone so opposed to factions, it seemed awfully like she was following their philosophy: 'factions before blood'. Maybe, I'm just putting so much thought into it. I do understand that she can't be perfect, and I wasn't expecting her to be, I simply wanted others to acknowledge her flaws and not just brand her a 'hero'. For someone so knowledgeable, why couldn't she understand that divisions within a group makes a group weak?

But then she committed the ultimate sacrifice act: she risked her life for those she loved. And for this reason, and this reason alone, I honour her with the title 'A True Hero'. The ending still sucks, though.

I received this book through NetGalley.