Articulate, ardent, pragmatic 

We first meet our 15-year-old MC dreading being dropped off at an exclusive private boarding school where they will finish  their high school education. Their mother (unbeknownst to them) applied on their behalf, resulting in a full scholarship to this otherwise unaffordable institute. 
🇺🇸 🍂 Set in 1991, during the fall term at a boarding school in Greensboro Falls, Massachusetts, USA

🎙️ Excellent narration. The emotions and reactions are portrayed in the narrator's voice and it isn't overdone or cheesy. There are well-timed pauses and changes in cadence that set the scene and add to the story.  

🐺🐕Growls, Howls, and Tail Wags: 

👌 The audio is probably preferable over text-only since we are deep in Sarah (our MC's) mind and the writing is sensory and introspective. The audio adds nuance and elements of panic, fear, confusion, anger, elation that could be monotonous if you're not big on character-studies or in-their-head atmospheric plots. 

🤔 I don't consider this unreliable narrator, because Sarah is aware of her symptoms and that what she experienced during them may not be real. It doesn't seem like she's lying to us or unhinged. When Sarah's interpretation is correct we see an intuitive, sensitive teen pick up on all the energies around her. And when she's incorrect, she's torturing herself and losing out on friendships and support. 

😅 This could be a slog if you don't want to be in an angsty teenage mindset. The story isn't OTT but Sarah is OTT sometimes. As an aspiring academic, she talks and thinks in a pretentious way overusing symbolism and comparisons. She's at that cusp between adult reasoning and childhood ignorance, and it's exacerbated by mental illness, but relatable. Like many of us at that age, she can be annoying, cringey, creepy, antagonistic, and melodramatic.

🤷 The pacing trips up after the murder. Kind of rushed, fragmented, everything is going off-the-rails feeling. And I don't know what to do with that ending? A part of me loves it, and a part of me feels guilty for loving it!

🤗 I thing this story could be a great YA/new adult, but proceed with caution since there is severe bullying, an adult-minor relationship, threats against LGBTQ people (systemic and from peers), and we are deep in our MC's mind about why she feels the compulsion to commit suicide, complete with planning and details. I love that the author didn't sugar-coat things, so the characters are layered, complex, and realistic/recognizable, but it results in a dark and potentially triggering story. 

👍 Overall, this seemed like an an empathetic look at experiencing severe mental illness, particularly as a young person. And navigating the medical system, although that isn't the main theme. Sarah has had misdiagnoses, lack of follow-up care, and at one point a doctor even told her mother that her condition is basically a terminal illness because she will probably kill herself one day.  It isn't written as though ALL teens with bipolar would have similar experiences either. And I learned about hallucinations that can come with bipolar - I had to Google it, at first I didn't believe it because I'd never heard it before.

Mood Reading Match Up: 

Content Heads-Up: Mental illness rep (good to excellent?; Sarah is layered, complex, and more than just her illness). Mental illness (fantastical thinking, panic attacks, mania, depression, paranoia, dissociation, hallucination/psychosis, tics). Obsession and obsessive thinking. Social anxiety. Suicidal ideation and planning. Suicide attempt. Existential crisis. Homophobia (prejudice, persecution, outing). Adult/minor relationship. Infidelity. Teen pregnancy. Severe bullying and targeting (descriptive, on page). 

Format: Scribd Audio