The one where Dan’s mom throws him a huge “Happy Gay Day” surprise party to celebrate him coming out as gay, where they eat hot dogs with seminal-like mustard, have phallic shaped cake, and his mom and Vanessa where black and hot pink baby tanks that say “PFLAG” (parents and friends of lesbians and gays) and “HE”S MY GAY BOYFRIEND” across the chest. Dan’s boyfriend Greg wears rainbow suspenders and teaches everyone how to make cosmopolitans. Chuck Bass is also at the party with his snow monkey Sweetie- who is wearing a tiny t shirt that says “SILENCE = DEATH”. Jenny Humphrey famously wears a purple Juicy Couture sweat suit and navy Pumas.

Dan writes the following poem:
Love. Above. Shove.
I love to shove you from above?
Kiss. Bliss. Piss.

Open the fridge and put
My heart on a plate
I’m just as you left me, and I taste even better leftover.
Pale fury, why did you leave me?
You’re prickly in the morning. So prickly.
This isn’t a cooking show.
This isn’t chemistry or geography.
It’s physics. Pure physics.