REREAD 2020

Even better the second time around. I noticed so many little things that I didn't even think about the first time I was reading.

I remember finding Sev kind of annoying when I read Crown of Feathers last year. And while he does go through a lot of character development and I grew to love him just as much as I do Veronyka and Tristan, this time around I appreciated and understood his situation so much more. I don't think people understand the decisions you have to make in order to survive, unless they've been through something similar. And while Sev does a lot of stupid stuff, I don't blame him at all for being selfish, because sometimes you have to be selfish in order to be okay. Kade did annoy me more this time around because I related so much more to Sev, and his arrogance and superiority made me angry. Still, I'm curious to see what happened to him in the next book.

Val makes me as angry as ever. Maybe even more so than the first time. This book and just everything about it is so relatable ugh, and I honestly think it's a me thing and not something everyone will necessarily feel or understand

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I LOVED THIS SO MUCH AHHHH

THIS BOOK. YOU GUYSS. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE READ IT.

It is now one of my all time favourites and definitely makes my Top Reads of 2019 list!

If you're a fan of Tamora Pierce, this book pays homage to so many different aspects of her Tortall books, you'll be internally screaming the entire time. We have animages, who have the ability to interact/communicate with animals, especially phoenixes. The entire time, I was thinking of Daine. There are actual lines that some of the characters say that brought me back to the Immortals series. It's just so great and perfect and I loved all of it so much. Later on, our main character disguises herself as a boy to become a Phoenix Rider, and I was freaking out cause ALANNA. We have a Jon-like character, except he's actually a million times better and not an entitled brat. IT WAS JUST SO GOOD.

I really enjoyed the writing too. It flowed so well and was easy to read. This book has a very heavy past, with a lot of world building and history, and the author did such a good job of incorporating bits and pieces into the story. I never felt like I was getting a history lesson in the middle of a dialogue scene. The moments were never jarring, but easily slipped in between conversations. It really built up the world slowly and steadily and we got little reminders here and there to make things easy to keep track of. There's also a timeline and glossary and cast of characters at the end, which makes it super convenient too. I really, really need to get my hands on a physical copy, because I'd love to look at that timeline closer, and the map is absolutely beautiful!

Our main character, Veronyka, is a very likeable and relatable character. She goes on such a huge journey throughout this book, and not just physically, but mentally/emotionally too. This book deals with some heavy topics, specifically emotional abuse/manipulation, especially by family members. As the reader, we can see clearly how scared Veronyka is when it comes to her sister Val. How she's constantly on edge and wondering what will cause Val to explode next. She lives to please her sister, but its so twisted and awful, knowing that Val has manipulated and emotionally abused her to become this way. Veronyka's moment of clarity takes a while. It happens in steps and I really liked seeing her finally come to the realization of how toxic Val actually is. I was worried we'd get a lot of scenes were Veronyka would keep apologizing and going back to Val, but she stands her ground and I love that about her so much. It fit with her character arc and her realization that she could be independent and fend for herself and not depend on anyone else. She was just really inspiring and I think could give a lot of people hope who are in similar situations. The one thing I'm not sure about was the ending. Veronyka decides that because of everything that has happened, she doesn't want to necessarily cut herself off from her sister and hate her forever, and while I think that's very honourable, a part of me is petty lol I really hate toxic people. I hate people who use the intimacy of a relationship against a person with the goal of being controlling and manipulative. I don't think they deserve to be forgiven, especially not by the person who had to go through all of this. Obviously Veronyka is a better person than I am, and based off of where this series seems to be headed, it fits with what I think the author is trying to do.

The other character who goes through emotional abuse/manipulation is Tristan. We don't see a lot of him at the beginning of the book, but the little we do see is really sad. I did not like Commander Cassian at all. And honestly I wasn't a huge fan of how his behaviour was explained. It was the whole he-loves-him-and-wants-to-protect-him-so-that's-why-he's-so-hard-on-him. That doesn't justify the abuse. It doesn't justify how scared Tristan is to stand up for himself in front of his father. When Commander Cassian praises him for finally speaking up and showing him that he's as a leader, I wanted to shake him. That's messed up and just sad. I am glad that we don't get a complete reversal of the relationship and suddenly Tristan and his dad are best friends. We still see that Tristan is cautious around him and knows his father's faults and the way he would most likely react. So he isn't completely blinded by his father's sudden expression of favour, which I think was done well. I also really liked his growth as a character. We get different glimpses of him, pre-Nyk and post-Nyk, and while it can seem like two different people, we also understand what's going on inside his head and why he acts the way he does. He's a good person in the end, and as the Jon-like character, he is a billion times better.

The one thing that did bother me was the romance that was hinted at between Tristan and Veronyka. Nothing really happens in this first book, and I did really enjoy them growing their relationship into this beautiful friendship, but the romantic undertones did annoy me. Mostly cause in the middle of a battle scene, I don't think I would be focused on how I can feel Tristan's chest pressed up to my back and his thighs touching mine, but this is probably just me lol There were also moments when Veronyka suddenly can't help focusing on Tristan's breathing and the smell of his clothes etc. which just makes me roll my eyes and think "it's too allo." That being said, Tristan does seem to have some kind of feelings towards Nyk before he finds out that Nyk is a girl, so it makes me think he's probably bisexual. We also have a lesbian Pheonix Rider couple that are mentioned in Pyra's history.

The one aexual rep we have was nice I guess, but I really didn't love her. I wish we could get better asexual rep in books, but the one rep we do get is

Spoiler

someone who is evil, and also abusive and manipulative. She's selfish and violent. We go from rooting for her character at the beginning, especially since she is someone Veronyka looks up to, to realizing that she isn't all that history has made her out to be. I did really like this twist in the plot, but the reasoning this character comes to at the end is a messed up

And lastly, we have Sev. I really didn't like him in the beginning. He's not a hero–his POV really focuses on that and I really grew to love it eventually. Not everyone is a hero. Not everyone is brave enough to do the right thing. It's okay to want to just survive and get through life the easy way. And while Sev annoyed me at times for being a little selfish and so oblivious to what was going on around him, it made me relate to him even more. I felt like Kade in the story, going from hating Sev to realizing that what he's gone through explains his actions, but also that you can't expect everyone to become what you imagined them to be in your head. Sev does change, it takes time, but he realizes he wants purpose in his life. And Kade becomes better too. He bothered me as well, cause he's kind of self-righteous and thinks highly of himself. I really did enjoy their relationship and I hope what Sev thinks happened didn't happen cause I want more.

I want next year to be now so I can read the sequel. I wasn't even planning to read this book and now I am completely obsessed and can think of nothing else ajsdfjsdkf