I am only slightly exaggerating when I say that this book took me 42 million years to complete. I first began reading it in late 2019, then stopped, then started again, then stopped, on and on ad nauseum through the fall of the dinosaurs, on Noah's ark, through to the modern day where I finally, finally, finally was able to finish due to my unparalleled willpower and the fact that this book doesn't ACTUALLY suck.

D'Artagnan is hilarious. He is just so self-absorbed and ridiculous that I couldn't help but laugh at him. The way he tries to fight three separate musketeers within a handful of minutes - top notch comedy. Also, he's such a man whore. Madame Bonacieux, Milady, and poor, sweet Kitty? What a life he leads. Athos, Porthos, and Aramis are also cool AF, which is why the book is called The Three Musketeers and not D'Artagnan, though to be fair it is book one of the D'Artagnan Romances, so let's call it a draw.

Anyway, this story had a lot of action and drama, but I think the biggest fault that it had (which was mostly a fault of mine) is that I had no clue what the politics of the situation were all about. Oh, so we hate the Cardinal and everyone who likes him.....cool cool cool. But why? Regardless, Alexandre Dumas brought it with this book and though it is unlikely that I will ever read it again, at least I'll have a better appreciation for the movie!