I'm quite literally in-love with this book. I have never done anything to learn about schizophrenia, apart from knowing the basics. Reading about a teenager around my age go through that experience was eye-opening. Adam goes through so much. I love that even though this book was about something something, there was still romance involved. It somehow proves that even if you have a "medical defect" you can still find someone that can love you. I love Dwight and Maya, they didn't care that he was schizophrenic. I wish we got an insight into Ian's life. Obviously, he is a massive douche but I don't think he is the way he is for no reason. If there isn't, then I just hate him 10 times more than I do already. This book was beautiful, may be one of favourites.

This was actually a decently good book. It was set up like a journal and recounted the daily life of Adam, a boy with schizophrenia who is just wanting and trying to live a normal life. He is on this trial drug and it starts to work but then it stops working and everything he had built while in the height of the trial, starts to fall apart. It shows a roller-coaster of emotions and how hard Adam tries despite his mental illness.

Just found out This Was Turned Into A Movie and it's coming august the 7th i-

I don't really know what this book was trying to accomplish. It started off really compelling, then it just got worse. It was every other Young Adult novel with a high school setting, except the main character had an unusual mental illness. I didn't understand the roles and importance of the protagonist's family members, and the other kids in school. I think what bothers me the most is that it seemed like every character in the book was a superficial bland caricature. Everything just happened exactly how you would expect it to. I didn't understand why the book was written in letter form, sometimes in second person. That format didn't work for me. Especially since so much of the novel was essential "ok, so, you know that this bad situation happened, but let me tell you how it went down in my brain." That is just not a very captivating way of expressing a story. It felt like a lot was lost, in regards to a deeper characterization or motives, as a result of the written letter form. What aggravated me was the note in the back about how the story was based on symptoms of schizophrenia, but "it is important to note that the vast majority of people battling this mental illness are not violent and do not pose a danger to others." If that was important enough to include in a special note at the end of a novel about a schizophrenic boy who IS violent and DOES pose a danger to others, then maybe the book shouldn't have been written about a schizophrenic teenager who is violent and dangerous. It just felt like this book was trying too hard to be something special and deep. It was full of tropes, and I feel like the story of Adam deserved better. Adam had his funny comments, which I enjoyed, but overall, the more I think about this book, the more I hate it.

Terrific novel that describes adolescent schizophrenia in an honest and hopeful way...

I would like to preface this with the fact that I do not think that a 2 is a bad rating for a book. It simply means that I probably would not read it again, but I am happy to have read it at all, and that I would probably borrow this from a library or buy it for someone else.

With that being said, I appreciate what this book was trying to do. I feel that this book would be an enjoyable read for younger audiences, however, I did not wholly enjoy it. I was put off by some of the things Adam said/did/thought, but I appreciate his honesty - with himself and with his journal/therapist. He is just a teenager after all.

The writing of the book was entertaining, but I was not really interested in anything going on. I could maybe read the last two-thirds of the book again, but the pacing was a little off for me. I didn't really feel like anything was happening. The romance was 'meh' for the most part, but I appreciate Maya and her approach to Adam very much, and there were a few scenes between the two that made me feel warm. I also enjoyed his interactions with his hallucinations and reading between the lines with what each hallucination was contributing to his life and to the story. Though, as someone who has had a schizophrenic person in their life, I have to say that this was an entirely different experience - which is completely valid because everyone is different.

Overall, I think this book is worth a read.

4.5 rounding up to 5.

Told in diary format to his therapist or doctor, the MC, Adam, is in an experimental drug trial for his schizophrenia. A previous incident has made starting at a new school a better idea for Adam, and so he enrolls in St. Agatha's. Adam deals with bullies (rich kid Ian; his dad is on the school board and they have buildings named after them) while making friends with Dwight and carving out a relationship with Maya. Initially, the drug is very promising, but eventually stops working and Adam must be weened off of it. Scared of having his secret revealed, Adam makes some dubious choices that impact others.

Spoiler

Violence: some: bullying; some related to Adam's voices and hallucinations
Language: medium
Drugs/Drinking: I don't remember any specific incidences
Sexual Content: Yes. Discussion of masturbation and Adam and Maya have sex after dating for several months. He is thoughtful and safe regarding their experience.
Diversity/Other: Dwight was conceived through artificial insemination (older woman wanted a child- I just thought it was interesting) and Maya is Filipino.


Adam's stepdad Paul demonstrates kindness and love, especially since he and Adam's mom become pregnant in the middle of the story. Adam writes about his feelings with the baby, the fact that his mom is having sex :), and Paul's horrid, racist mother.

The Newtown Connecticut shooting also plays a role in the story and I thought the author did an interesting and clever job relating Adam's illness to the public's perception and assumptions related to mental illness. How we fear what we don't know and want to control and remove those fears before we can check if they are really worth decimating.
Adam's feelings and thoughts are interesting and thoughtful. The description of the voices and hallucinations were fascinating. I think this is an excellent novel detailing living with a mental illness.

One of Adam's hallucinations crushes cookies and drops the crumbs in front of Adam, and Adam documents:
But, Adam, at this point, didn't you know he was a hallucination? Why, yes, Professor, I did. The same way I know that there are no monsters under my bed. But that doesn't mean I let my feet dangle over the edge either. It's difficult to know anything with absolute certainty, especially with a very real hallucination staring back at me. p202



Booklist, Kirkus, and PW all rate ages 12/13+ or grade 7+
SLJ says grade 10+

This was a reread and I can say it’s still one of my favourite books.

unbelievable how i preferred the movie adaptation over this. it was so hard to get through i actually had to stop and couldn’t read any further than chapter 20. the main character was a tad bit annoying, and i didn’t like the writing style (strange, since i loved similar books such as “perks of being a wallflower”).
it’s sad, i really wanted to enjoy the book because i was interested in learning more about schizophrenia from adam’s actual thoughts, but i couldn’t stand the events nor the characters. so yeah, i’m sorry about this :(