Excellent advice for parents/teachers of boys and girls.

I was very intrigued by this book and looked forward to gaining a lot of insight into the male mind. As a mom of two boys, I felt I needed to read it.

I have mixed emotions about this book. I think that the overall message of the book is a good one, but it takes far too long to get there and to offer helpful information. Most of the book, the first 11 chapters (200+ pages) are based on clients who serve as examples to prove a point. (This boy had issues with his dad and look what happened, etc...). I found it difficult to read and at times frustrating and depressing. It took me a long time to read this book because it seemed like cases were presented and you never got closure. I felt that this book could have been written better. The best chapter, the last one, Chapter 12: What Boys Need was the most helpful to me. If you are looking for practical advice, skip right to it. Unfortunately it feels rushed and again, there is not a lot of detail. I felt like it was the most important part for me to read and it was the shortest chapter. The case studies are interesting, but not overly helpful. I wish the seven principles introduced in chapter 12 had been stated immediately and then the examples of patients could have been worked in. A lot of the cases end sadly and left me feeling discouraged. I was looking for more explicit guidance.

3.5 stars. Although this book stumbles a bit when trying to distinguish between masculinity and feminity, the underlying message about the importance of recognizing and validating the emotional lives of boys is hugely important. I would say this is a good introductory book to the topic of male mental health, but those looking for a more up to date discussion on the topic should look elsewhere.

A GREAT READ FOR PARENTS AND TEACHERS!

This book had great information 20 years ago but feels outdated now.

This book is useful for understanding the male psyche and the baggage that comes with being a boy. I would have liked more information from a parent's perspective...

3.5 stars

Lots of good discussion in this book about raising boys... hope I can take some of the techniques and apply to my two young boys... I would recommend this to any fathers of boys!

“What do boys need that they’re not getting?” In a compelling success, Dan Kindlon and Michael Thompson effectively tackle the toughest issues facing adolescent boys today: identity, self-expression, and “emotional intelligence.” In their book, the two psychologists candidly discuss the ways in which society has systematically suppressed the emotional needs of boys and compressed masculinity into stereotypical ideals, impossible for any boy to meet. By using specific case studies from their combined 35 years experience in the field of child psychology, the authors succeed in describing the emotional pitfalls of boyhood from birth through the college years. Their refreshingly frank analysis of adolescent boys is key in understanding the emotional as well as the educational needs of this important group. In openly discussing issues, such as depression, suicide, substance abuse, and sexuality, Kindlon and Thompson reveal many boys’ underlying yearning to be accepted by their parents and peers, while struggling to maintain an emotionally engaged persona in an emotionally barren masculine world. Although a bit generalizing in its analysis of father/son relationships and sparse in its coverage of homosexuality, the book offers valuable insight into the world of boys and guides their loved ones to understand the reasoning behind some of their perplexing behaviors. As relevant for educators as it is for parents, Raising Cain is essential reading for anyone who cares about the emotional and educational successes of adolescent boys.

I read this for a class and it was actually pretty interesting. I want to wrap my little guy up in a bubble now to protect him, but it was a good book.