Outrageous. 
That fact that she aggressively accused her father about grandparents death in concentration camp. How was it possible to think it was peaceful death in some place that has the same name as concentration camp?! Beyond me. Her rants about depression during and after pregnancy- they are not remotely funnt. Considering the fact she totally accepted and praised the girlfriend of her son on her carefree sex life and attitude towards consequences of her sex life - she should never had kids at all. Awful story.

This was a fun Labor Day read. It is short and as a mother in mid-life, it felt relevant to my thoughts on summer vacation. I haven’t ever been to Cape Cod (but we have been to Martha’s Vineyard and Newport a couple of times) and I loved the vibe of this annual summer tradition… including the making of sandwiches for the beach. I thought it was apropos how the main character also identified as being in the sandwich generation - between her parents and her children.

The book takes place over the length of the week and shows what unfolds each day of the week.

It isn’t just a saccharine book of memories. Rocky also remembers some difficult pregnancies and lost pregnancies (be aware of triggers) as she considers her children and her marriage.

There were so many quotes I loved from this book:

“They’ve been coming here for so many years that there’s a watercolor wash over all of it now: Everything hard has been smeared out into pleasant, pastel memories of taffy, clam strips, and beachcombing. Sunglasses and sunscreen and sandy feet pressed against her thighs and stomach. Little children running across the sand with their little pails. Her own parents laughing in their beach chairs, shrinking inside their clothes as the years pass. They’ve been coming here for so many years that there’s a watercolor wash over all of it now: Everything hard has been smeared out into pleasant, pastel memories of taffy, clam strips, and beachcombing. Sunglasses and sunscreen and sandy feet pressed against her thighs and stomach. Little children running across the sand with their little pails. Her own parents laughing in their beach chairs, shrinking inside their clothes as the years pass.” P1

“It’s so crushingly beautiful, being human,” the mother sighs, and the daughter rolls her eyes and says, “But also so terrible and ridiculous.” And maybe it’s all three. This one week.” Ch 1

“But first: the epic making of the sandwiches! I complain about this part of my vacation life, but I love it, and everybody knows this.” Ch 4

“I would pick this life too, I know. I’d even pick the way that pain has burnished me to brightness. The pain itself, though? I imagine I’d give it up if I could.” Ch 4

So my life with a teenager! 
“There might be Laffy Taffy wrappers and Dorito bags on every surface when you wake up in the cottage, a whiff of something funky in the air that maybe isn’t only hormones and sweat. Is it weed? Is it an actual skunk? Nobody knows.” Ch 5

“It’s so annoying the way women have to do all the hard things and take care of everybody and pay attention to everything all the time. And then be soft and open and f***able. It’s infuriating!” Ch 8

“Menopause feels like a slow leak: thoughts leaking out of your head; flesh leaking out of your skin; fluid leaking out of your joints. You need a lube job, is how you feel. Bodywork. Whatever you need, it sounds like a mechanic might be required, since something is seriously amiss with your head” ch 15

“I want to behave badly and be immediately forgiven. Or maybe it’s not that I want that—it’s just what I do.” Ch 15

“We just keep showing up for each other. Even through the mystery of other people’s grief. What else is there?” Ch 16

“Why do we love everyone so recklessly and then break our own hearts? And they don’t even break. They just swell, impossibly, with more love.” Ch 25

“But grief was like a silver locket with two faces in it. I didn’t know what the faces looked like, but it was heavy around my neck, and I never took it off.” Ch 28

“I make a mental note to rearrange my heart—to make a little more room for the changing realities.” Ch 38

“And this may be the only reason we were put on this earth. To say to each other, I know how you feel. To say, Same. To say, I understand how hard it is to be a parent, a kid. To say, Your shell stank and you’re sad. I’ve been there.” Ch 39

“Maybe grief is love imploding. Or maybe it’s love expanding. I don’t know. I just know you can’t create loss to preempt loss because it doesn’t work that way. So you might as well love as much as you can. And as recklessly. Like it’s your last resort, because it is.” Ch 43

Made me laugh

Absolutely not what I expected. And absolutely lovely anyway, a perfect mix of emotion and humor, delicately balanced in a reminder to be present -- especially as a mother -- honest, and ask for help.

4.5 stars. I don't think SANDWICH is perfectly written: its pace is uneven, and its proclamations about family are somewhat repetitive. But man, does it have heart. Catherine Newman is one of the few writers I've encountered who can put words to everyday feelings of intense sheer love.

A gem and a half -- and set in Cape Cod! You just can't make it better!

This book was... Okay! I did notice pretty quickly that I for sure was not the target audience. As a 24-year-old woman, I could more than relate to Rocky's children but struggled connecting to her, the main character. I found her irrational and frustrating and had difficulty empathizing at times. Still, when I showed some passages to my mid-50s mother, she said Rocky sounded completely normal, and her behavior, while not great, was understandable. So clearly, it's not quite a book that fits for me. Another thing I also found frustrating was the "miscommunication trope", if you will, that seems to permeate a lot of books when there needs to be a conflict that arises. It's tiresome as a reader, but realistic as well, so it's not a deep-seated qualm I have with Newman. On a much minor note, there were a few times in dialogue and Rocky's inner monologue that made me physically cringe, which was a bit painful but again, I'm 24, and my mom joking about TikTok makes me cringe too, so it tracks.

Overall a decent read, but it is difficult to relate to the main character without undergoing menopause myself. I suppose that uncomfortableness I chaffed up against is intended, to try to get readers to understand the feelings and actions of someone undergoing these insane hormone changes. But I'm not in the audience/demographic that can emotionally connect to Newman's book/writing.